People I can Do Without #19
"I was rich, I was horny, I wanted to get laid"
1. Never get married. For any reason!
It seems to me that not a day goes by where something, someone, or some place truly annoys or confuses me. With this in mind I've decided to take my thoughts to the people! Hopefully this entertains a bit and please keep in mind at all times.... I DO NOT own a gun!
Of course, looking like that I would let him in and he would call me "big poppa"
Anyway, without further ado... My conversation with Numby.
Mr. A - Numby, how are you?
Numby - Meow
Mr. A - Why, in the middle of the night, do you shake the door so violently that your mother and I are awoken from our sleep in fear of our lives?
Mr. A - Fair enough, but if you're hungry why not eat the food already on your plate in the kitchen? Do you even check the plate? See, I don't think you do. I think that when the sun starts to appear outside the window you think "time to eat" and start freaking out! Never mind that it's 5:30 in the morning and we have to work all day.
Mr. A - I know that it pleases you to eat but it pleases the humans to sleep. On to other topics. Why won't you use the scratching post I purchased? Your sister uses it and is perfectly happy to do so. Why do you use the rugs and chairs? Keep it up and I'm taking the rugs away
Numby - (hisses)
Mr. A - Well, that's too bad.
Numby - (Hisses louder)
Mr. A - You brought this on yourself. You have only yourself to blame! And while we're on the topic of personal behavior, why can't you cover up your shit when you're done in the litter box? Honestly! I've never seen a cat walk into a litter box, shit, and then walk back out without even kicking the litter one time. I mean you don't even ATTEMPT to cover it! One Goddamn kick! Is it really that hard? We buy you new litter all the time and clean that box so it's fit for a king to shit in and you can't even give me one half-assed kick? Can't even fake it?
Numby - (tilts his head to the left and stares)
Mr. A - You know what I'm saying!
Numby - (walks away)
Mr. A - Good talk. Thanks for stopping by!
And now the folks on the left are running around screaming GLOBAL WARMING! GLOBAL WARMING!
Well.... Yes, and no.
The fact is Global Warming is a real threat. It does exist and isn't a "theory" as the chimp in the White House was claiming up until a year or so ago. However, it's not leading to the end of the world in the next five minutes if Obama isn't elected.
While some of these events can be traced back to climate change and our arrogant abuse of the planet the fact is many of them can just be filed under the heading of "Shit Happens"
And it does....
Mudslides, Hurricanes, Forest Fires, Avalanches, Typhoons, Tsunamis, Volcanic Eruptions, Earthquakes, Mass Flooding and Tornadoes.
All of these things have been happening since before the invention of hairspray and charcoal.
Certainly we haven't helped. However, I find it more than a little hypocritical that the left wing environmental groups have hijacked this topic and have made it their sole goals in life to try and scare the living hell out of everybody by exploiting it ad nausea.
Four years ago I watched the Republicans tell anyone within ear shot that if elected President, John Kerry would sit back and watch as the "terrorists and evil doers" blew the hell out of every city in America!
The politics of fear! And it worked... The worst President in history "won" a second term.
Fear is a powerful thing and it was shameful how the Right Wing exploited it for their own greed and agenda. It pissed me off then and it still does now.
But now here we are, four years later, and I'm watching the fringe of the Left Wing do the same thing with global warming. They want you to believe that if you elect John McCain he'll sit back and watch as American cities are swallowed up by the oceans.
Will Barack Obama push harder for alternative fuels and a more sound energy policy than McCain? I believe he will. And I will be voting for Obama over McCain for a dozen other reasons as well.
However, fear will not be one of them.
I would urge my friend's on the left to give the finger to environmental groups pushing the politics of fear the same way they gave the finger to fear mongers four years ago when pulling that lever for Kerry. Global Warming is a serious problem that requires serious attention paid to it. It will require all hands on deck from BOTH sides of the political aisle. By allowing it to become a wedge issue we as Americans are permitting the one truly bi-partisan issue we have to become a Left Vs. Right "debate"
Helping heal the planet shouldn't be open to debate. It's one of those things that we should all be able to agree on by applying simple common sense.
Like hunting down Rosie O'Donnell and locking her away...
Think of the all wasteful air we could save.